I learned that there was a sexual assault on the campus recently. It is information that I must know, but that also hurts to know. I must know because my role is to understand issues that may lead to suicidality. It hurts to know because my daughter, and the other students on campus are not safe there, not entirely, and I feel helpless to do anything about it.
I imagine, for those whose loved ones die by suicide, it is a similar set of complex feelings. It is not always obvious if an individual has deliberately chosen to die, and even skilled professionals struggle to deliniate between, for example, an accidental overdose with a known-to-be-deadly opiod and suicide, or a sexual misadventure and suicide. Still, for those families and friends dealing with grief and shock, knowing the truth about how their loved one died can eventually lead to healing. Still, information like this must be delivered cautiously, and only to those who request it. The details of a death-by-suicide should, in my opinion, belong to the family, and never be shared without permission. However, the fact of a suicide is a different matter. Stigma about suicide thrives where there is silence and falsehoods.
Take care of eachother out there!
Learn more:
Coluccia, A., Gabbrielli, M., Gualtieri, G., Ferretti, F., Pozza, A., & Fagiolini, A. (2016). Sexual Masochism Disorder with Asphyxiophilia: A Deadly yet Underrecognized Disease. Case Reports in Psychiatry, 2016, 5474862. https://doi.org/10.1155/2016/5474862
Dworkin, E. R., DeCou, C. R., & Fitzpatrick, S. (2020). Associations between sexual assault and suicidal thoughts and behavior: A meta-analysis. Psychological Trauma: Theory, Research, Practice, and Policy. Advance online publication. https://doi.org/10.1037/tra0000570
Oquendo, M. M.D.,Ph.D., Volkow, N. M.D (2018) “Suicide: A Silent Contributor to Opioid-Overdose Deaths”, Perspective.
N Engl J Med 2018; 378:1567-1569
DOI: 10.1056/NEJMp1801417
